Not So Fabulous- Infertility


You may have read in previous posts that we got our cutey pie, a now two year old Landon, through in vitro. The real deal is that we tried for a year, then started tests which came up with NOTHING, and then tried artificial insemination to no avail.

I have to tell you that dealing with fertility issues is a marriage killer, a self esteem mutilator, and a faith shaker all rolled into one. Hubby and I heard from everyone on the issue, because of course everyones an expert on making babies..."just relax and don't think about it", or "drink some wine"...Hello? I have drank enough wine to know that it was not going to make me a baby. I asked myself why it was happening to me, the worst possible question you can ask yourself because you WILL come up with an answer.

For us, the saving grace was a preacher who divulged he had similar issues. He was unable to conceive and had adopted a boy. He consoled me, and prayed with me as we changed doctors and found a miracle worker here in Los Angeles.(Email me if you want his name, or if you want to talk about this!)

He told us that because I had my appendix out and there were a few complications, he thought scar tissue was preventing us from getting pregnant. He recommended we go to in vitro. We were a little hesitant because of multiples and the costs. It is $20,000 to do in vitro my friends. Holy cow. Making matters worse, health insurance companies in California DON'T PAY A DIME of the costs.


Luckily and with everyone praying their bibles off, we got Landon on the first try. Three eggs in, and one Landon came out. I find myself again at the start of a fertility cycle. Well, not really, we have frozen embryos so it will be way easier then starting from scratch. I am a little daunted, a little excited, and a little scared. I'm hoping again to get lucky on our first try and have a baby. This is where you come in!

Please pray for us as we embark on this journey once again. Pray we have one (or two) healthy baby(ies) and get it all wrapped up on our first go round. I will keep you posted about our process and let you know when the good news happens. Until then keep us on your prayer list please!

43 comments:

P said...

I'll pray, pray, pray, my friend! Good luck!

pinkpolkadotaa said...

My prayers are with you! Good luck!

Claire said...

Putting you on my daily prayer list. I always love what God said to Moses as he stood at the Red Sea - words to the effect of "stand back and see what I am going to do!" Exodus 14:13,14

MMM said...

My prayers are with you and I hope that Landon has a little brother or sister very soon!

Somewhere Between Pinot and Pacifiers said...

Lots of prayers for you!!!!!!! Landon will make a great big brother soon...I just know it!

Anonymous said...

Good luck! Your bab(ies) will be very lucky to have you as a mom.

Belle in Bloom said...

Lots and lots of prayers coming your way my sweet friend!
Thinking of you and the wonderful things to come!!!

~Belle

Tres Poshe Preppy said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I've had some friends deal with the same issues and have seen how devastating it can be. Happy and positive thoughts your way! Good luck to you and hubby!

Kate said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers - hang in there!

Pink in a sea of blue said...

I'll be praying! How exciting and nerve racking at the same time. I feel your pain because I had issues getting pregnant, too. Luckily it finally worked out (laproscopic surgery both times) for us, but I identify with all the feelings you said you felt. It will happen! I know it!

Kiki said...

You know, I know...you can count on me for some serious praying!!! All my best to you and your sweet family today, so exciting and fun to imagine the adventure ahead!!!!

Preppy Mama said...

Becoming a mommy was the best thing that ever happened to me. I know how important it is to me and I can't imagine the journey it took you to get to that beautiful little boy you have. Counting you in my prayers because I know you are one fabulous mom...pun intended!

Her Shabbyness: Sweet 'n Southern said...

You're in my prayers! I know that your little one will be a great big brother. Good luck on this journey, I'll be thinkin' of you :)

Mrs. K said...

I can't even imagine going through the ups and downs of that issue- G's brother is a popular IVF doctor in Chicago- the stories sometimes are heartbreaking others are joyous (like my very good friend who got preggo with IVF with two beautiful boys and then couldn't stop getting pregnant so that her husband had to be snipped)....and yeah the cost is unbelievable.

Etiquettely Correct said...

I will definitely pray for you! I love the "drink some wine" . . .

Lauren said...

You are in my prayers.

Ashley said...

Wow, best of luck to you! Your blog is really great. I hope you are successful this time too! Infertility can be such a heart-breaker, and it's very close to home in my family. My mom never was able to have kids, so she adopted both me and my brother as babies.

Buford Betty said...

Oh girl, as a fellow prego-proof, you know I'll be praying for you!!! How exciting that y'all are gearing up again! I really hope the first round works for you.

And I totally hear you on, well, everything. Everyone loves to give you their 2 cents... "have you tried...?" Infertility is such a lonely problem because no one truly *gets* how you feel unless they've been there themselves. So while I wouldn't wish it on anyone, it's always encouraging to find fellow fertile-challenged friends to hold hands with. Wishing you the best! And praying like a champ! :-)

Mrs.Preppy said...

I am praying for a little brother or sister for Landon!

Also, the vacay to Greece was fab. I already want to go back.

Mrs.Preppy said...

I am praying for a little brother or sister for Landon!

Also, the vacay to Greece was fab. I already want to go back.

Beth G. said...

Wow...I'm so excited for you! Prayers WILL be sent your way:)

I too went through IVF to get Hunter. 3+ years and our 3rd round of IVF...what a blessing! I'm in fertility "what do I do land?" right now. I met with a Dr. here and he said that my drug cocktail would most likely double from last time...ugh. Anyway...taking the summer off then we will see what we decide to do. I REALLY hope that this is just as successful as your first time:) You sure know how to make a cute kid!

Always Organizing said...

You are in my prayers!!! All the best :)

Jamie said...

I totally know where you are coming from. I didn't have to go IVF, but after 5 IUI's I got my first born and the second one I didn't have to do a thing! They both are a blessing but there is something really special about my first born because we TRIED so hard and so long! There is a great book, "My Very Wanted Child" by Lapporte if you haven't checked it out - you should! It's a great feel good book for anyone - but especially those of us that have had infertility... which as you said, is really really NOT SO FAB!

Wishing you the best in this time of unclearly! XO

Tiaras & Tantrums said...

prayers and good aura coming your way.
Just on the aside, is the issue with hubbie or you? Becase if with hubbie, his sperm will change cycles every 7 or so years. Didn't know if you had heard this or not?

Steel Magnolia said...

Sending multiple prayers your way....as you may know we had to do the "fertility thing" twice and now we have 3 boys. One due to IUI and 2 due to IVF on the first try. I so wish we could go out to lunch and chat this up....I felt like I was the only one out of my group of friends going through this and it was soooooo hard. Consider prayers sent!!!

Caffeine Court said...

I remember when I was having a hard time having my second (after many miscarriages) and people would actually say to me..."I have the opposite problem...we just touch toes and get pregnant!" Or "We got pregnant and he was wearing a condom!" Good for you-you insensitive oafs!

I will pray for you! I'm sure you will be successful and have a new bundle of joy (or two) before you know it!

Melissa said...

You guys are totally in my prayers! I wish you the best and I hope you get another baby (or babies!) very quickly!

Feener said...

special prayers being said

thewritegal said...

I will be praying for you!! After taking 3 years to conceive and suffering a miscarriage, my husband and I decided when we had a baby it would be our last. My beautiful daughter will be 8 in August. No one tells you what infertility can do to a marriage or that fertility drugs can make you FAT!! I gained 20 lbs. in 2 months. Then add 40 lbs of pregnancy and 8 years later I am still trying to get some of it off. But it was all worth it to have a beautiful baby (who is now a big girl). Please know that you are in my prayers. With God all things are possible. :)

Hillcrest Acres said...

I can understand your anquish over trying to have a baby. Although my story is a little different from yours; I didn't have a problem getting pregnant, my problem was staying pregnant. My thoughts and prayers are with you and hoping that you are successful on the first try again.

GOOD LUCK!!!

magnoliabelle said...

Many many prayers are coming your way!

Happy Homemaker said...

You are in my prayers! "God's timing is ALWAYS perfect!"

kenady said...

You bet! I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and close to my heart! Good luck! God be with you!

White Lily said...

I pray for you, and I'm really good at it!
We are not parents yet and I know how frustrating it is when people need to question you about why you can't have kids, and tell you all the secrets of baby making.
I don't have your strength, and if I don't have a baby within the next 5 years I'll stop trying or even wish for a baby.

Europafox said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Linney Shvede said...

You are so sweet and deserving! I will pray for you and send happy baby thoughts your way! Huggin' the Bible for ya, kiddo!

Jillian, Inc. said...

Sending all good wishes and prayers your way. Your little boy is so very, very precious and motherhood is such a wonderful gift, isn't it?

Mom x 2 said...

You have my full support and prayers!

My little guy has the same shirt as Landon has on in that photo - love the plaid crab!

Pink Preppy Party Girl said...

We are thinking about you all and you are in our prayers.

Karen said...

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

Karen

lizziefitz said...

I hope you can feel my specific prayers right now! Hugs!!!!

The Wife said...

I'm thinking about you, Fabulous! Best wishes!

Steel Magnolia said...

btw, thank you so much for the beautiful comment you left on my blog. wish we DID live closer, I'd love to hang out-we are sisters!