Motherhood and a Job Outside the Home= TWO JOBS

The Mr is a good provider. He works, hard. He leaves the house early and manages to keep us afloat in a shaky economy.  For me, working makes me feel useful and good about myself. The money is important but really it's for my soul. Working outside the home and being a Mom is TOUGH.

Let's face it. Motherhood is a job. A full time, overtime job. You plan their days, their meals, their social lives, their schooling, their wardrobe, their physical bodies...all while nurturing, educating, and trying not to lose your cool. It's like being a personal assistant to the most demanding celebrity that you adore. Not to mention the laundry, endless unloading of the dishwasher, and making sure the house isn't over run by filth and dust bunnies.

Now on top of that job, place another job.

It's two jobs! Makes me a little jealous that Mr comes home and spends time with the kids but has no agenda for them of any kind. Last night he came home and gave Landon a bath and was about to turn a movie on for him at his bed time. He just forgot that we normally put him to bed at 7:30. Must be nice! I am like Captain Von Trapp in this house, running this place like a tight ship and blowing my whistle! (Okay I'm not that bad but still...)

How do you do it all and not go insane? Anyone want to take on the topic?

14 comments:

Ouiser B said...

Dear Mrs.,

I love this post. After my first baby I tried to keep up my consulting biz and failed miserably. I just couldn't do both. And now with two little ones under two I considering blogging to be my second job. (please laugh, I am!)

In all honesty my "free time" comes in spurts of moments no longer hours so blogging and twitter are perfect outlets for me to keep one foot in the outside world while still being the best mom I can be.

While I am so very happy being a sahm, I do miss the adult conversations. And not just about lipgloss. Sometimes it's hard to remember that people used to actually pay me for advice.

Oh and I soo feel like Captain Von Trapp! That made me belly laugh, and i will think of you the next time I have to tap my mommy foot and say no to the hubs and kiddos.

Cheers,
Ouiser

Suburban Princess said...

I yell a lot - it seems to be the only thing that gets their attn...strange how they are always telling me I dont need to yell. Hmmm.

Brie said...

You're right, it is NOT easy. Lists, lists, and more lists. I take it one day at a time, some days are certainly more efficient than others but you got to roll with it.

Sweet Southern Prep said...

Love Capt. Von Trapp, especially when he sings Edelweiss. :) Just recently found out that he actually didn't sing that part himself. Boo.

Being one of six girls, we had strict parents too, but no whistle. :) I'll probably be just as strict, so thankful for them.

Jillian, Inc said...

Well, I am insane so I don't have any words of wisdom-ha! The one thing I insist on is a weekly housekeeper or otherwise I'd not only be insane, but locked up. I don't want to spend what little "time away from the office" I have scrubbing floors.

Will and Lindsay said...

I try to plan ahead as much as I can. Ha! On the Sunday night before my first day back at work (post baby #2), I got everything organized for the next day and was feeling good...got in bed at 11pm.

11:30 pm- 3 year old wakes up puking
2:00 am- More puking
2:30 am- 6 mos old wakes up with ear infection
4:00 am- More puking
8:00 am- Should be on the way to drop 3 year old at school but instead I am throwing puke sheets in the washer and waiting on new nanny who is late due to an accident on the 101.
9:00 am- Brief call with Boss
10:00 am- Take baby to the pediatrician for antibiotics. Leave puking 3 year old with nanny and will stop for Gatorade and antibiotics on the way home...

Yada, yada, yada.

By 8pm, I am exhausted but the kids are asleep and I can finally focus on work. Focus, yeah right!

At least I am lucky enough to work from home.

LPC said...

I remember when I had my first baby, I told someone that if this were a job, I would tell them the organization was poorly designed, and that I needed either colleagues or an assistant:). It's so tough in the early days. And you have had Landon's medical issues too. It does get easier. You have to keep yourself happy, because whether we like it or not, we are the foundation. And when we are unhappy for too long, everything falls apart.

Andie said...

Could not agree with what you've said more. Down to the reason I work.

Thanks for sharing the gifties.

The dresses are from the Gap.

AMY said...

Oh, I could go on and on about this subject. Being a mother is more than a full time job by itself! You work a 12 hour shift 7 days a week and you are always on call. Add another job and it is CRAZY sometimes. I am thankful to work for a company that allows so much flexability for families to keep priorities strait. I don't think I could do it otherwise. I, like you, get so much more than financial gain from my career. It does keep me connected to a world that has been a big part of who I am. With balance, most days go fine but I do have to take my control freak nature down a notch to survive...and a housekeeper is a MUST. The smell of a clean house is better than a massage for me. I know, I have issues.

bevy said...

A. Captain Von Trapp... yummy!

B. I understand the "planning" part. I have everyone color-coded in my Droid calendar. The boys are green and yellow (I am pink - of course! And my husband/family events are blue.) You can only imagine the amounts of green and yellow! It makes my tired just looking at it.

C. How do I do it and not go insane? Read http://itsagoldenday.blogspot.com/2010/04/mom-i-thought-my-name-was-d-it.html.

D. Love knowing you are a Carolina Girl! Thanks for your sweet comment... xox

Houses, Couches and Babies said...

Oh, and I understand what you are saying! While I only gave birth to 2 children, I actually have three (the hubby being #3). Before having kids I didn't feel like I had to take care of him nearly as much as I do now. And just like you, I have to crack the whip on my husband when he wants to let the kids stay up past their bedtimes...what does he care...he doesn't get them dressed, feed them breakfast and get them ready for the day. I love my husband to death, and he is a great father...but he will never be a mother! Lucky him!

Solar Powered said...

Structure is everything, schedules, calendars, and lists keep me sane. My other sanity keeper is to sit down and turn it off at night if only for 30 min...blog, read, take a bath, watch tivo. Anything to decompress. I, too, have a good partner in this journey and we email, text, or call several times a day. My coworkers make fun but it is so much easier to discuss issues (weekend plans, yardwork, dinner plans) when they come to mind rather than put it off.

Southern Cupcake said...

I love this post. I just posted about this exact topic earlier at lunch and then read your post. I laughingly tell people that I don't need a full time nanny, maid, personal trainer, etc. What I really need is a WIFE!

In our hectic pace of life and constant rush mode, balancing work/life/kids/family/aging parents regardless if you work in and/or outside the home is hard and some days it is impossible to do it all, be it all, have it all, etc.

Southern Cupcake said...

LOL with Houses, Couches and Babies...

I tell people I have "four" kids: dear daughter, dear son, my husband and our dog...