Preschool! Hard time for your child or hard time for you??!!

Landon will be going to preschool for the first time in a week or two. School. By himself. Without me! I know, I should be thrilled, excited, jumping for joy! Instead, I'm a little sad. Scared! FREAKED OUT!

I'll miss having him around! Yes, he can drive me insane. Yes, he is ready for school. Yes, it will be good for him but I'll miss him! My baby! What will he (I mean I without him) do without me!

Landon's teacher came for a home visit. She was lovely, Landon adored her. All went well. I just keep thinking about having to drop him off. DROP HIM OFF? I barely let my nanny watch him, let alone some teachers. Oh boy. What to do?

I going to try to focus on making the transition as smooth as possible for him. (Cut to me bawling in the parking lot!)

I thought I'd share some points the school mentioned to help with Landon's (I mean my) transition to preschool.

1) Explain what will happen to your child when you separate- Simple and straight forward and keep it positive!

2) Explain what will happen when you're apart- Show enthusiasm for what your child will be doing at school.

3)Establish a goodbye routine- 3 kisses and a high five? A little story? a big hug? Keep it short and consistent. Remain firm in your leaving. This creates trust.

4) Leave tangible signs of love- a picture of you? A toy? blanket? This can all be a comfort while you're separated.

5) Explain what will happen when you're reunited- Let them know when you're coming back and what will happen. Be reassuring.

6) Accept unexpected reunion reactions! some kids will be joyful, hysterical, ambivalent...about how the day went. They may or may not be happy to see you!

7) Do games and role playing- Even if not in school every day, practice games and role playing about school to make the child feel better. Use a doll, pretend they are going to school, saying bye to mommy etc.

Well, I feel better. Do you?


suburban prep said...

Though not a mom I have heard from both of my sisters regarding this same situation recently with their children.
One sister has a 4,3 and 8 month old. The 4 yr old went to Jr kindergarten by himself last week requesting that his mother not take him into school.
The other sister has a 6 yr old who started 1st grade and even though they live across the street from the school. My sister still had issues with letting her go to school.
I wish you the best of luck. Just know that you will see him in a few hours and that a child will always love seeing his mother.

Cookie Crums said...

HA! That's all well and good until you actually have to do it. My little boy just turned 2 and started preschool yesterday.

How did you go over? He cried almost the entire time he was there! 8:30 - 11:30. I was cool up until I heard this. Then I wanted to cry. I dropped him off with no problem on my part (as he was screaming hysterically) and just walked away after hugs and kisses. But when I heard how upset he was, I swear I thought about not taking him back. He's going back for day 2 tomorrow.

Kate said...

As a mom & former teacher (preschool & kindergarten) I agree - this is a great list! Also wanted to add - use the same language every time if you can...somethings like "After Circle time, Mommy comes back." (Or whatever the last activity of the day is...) And whatever the teacher(s) think about Landon's experience at school - always follow YOUR gut! You know your child best of all.

Katiesperk said...

Good luck! Those sound like good tips. I hope it goes smoothly for you and if not there is always shopping to soothe a troubled mind! (I sometimes substitue boozing)

mrsb said...

I'd suggest dropping the "taking something with them" thing and add instead reading "The Kissing Hand" and give him a kiss in his hand that he can press to his face whenever he misses you.

The kiss cannot be lost, or left at school, or fought over with other kids who want to share.

When my oldest (now a senior in high school!) went to preschool, it ran all day. All day! No half days. I cried every single day for a week on the walk home after dropping him off, lol!

PaperCourt said...

He'll do great! I'm dropping my oldest off at kindergarten next week. He can't wait...but I'm a little sad thinking my baby is at big kid school now.

cancersucks said...

And if all else fails bribery works...a treat on their car seat if they go to school with bawling/screaming/chasing after you! Luckily I only had to impose this with my third. The first two barely waved good bye when they went to preschool...and today, too! The Kissing Hand and What to expect at Preschool are cute books to help with the transition- for Landon, not for you, silly! Growing up is hard for the moms to do. Good luck!

Solar Powered said...

great tips, communication is everything. LOVE the new look!

Maureen said...

My little boy loves to know what we're doing while he's at school. If I forget to tell him, he'll ask. The fact that baby sister is napping while he's at preschool helps. He doesn't like to miss anything! This is going to be sooooo good for him. (and you!)

Tippy said...

I was just going to recommend you read The Kissing Hand but read someone else suggested it first. I second the suggestion!

It will be OK. I promise. I took mini #1 to preschool 4 years ago this fall for the first time and I didn't bawl until I got in the car. Try to be positive for Landon and then you can fall apart when you get home.

Good luck!

Pink in a sea of blue said...

Well everyone is suggesting "The Kissing Hand". #2's teacher read it to them yesterday at their orientation (30 min) day as the kids sat in our laps. Very cute, but #2 is a pro at this and so am I! You'll be ok after a few days. It will give you quality time with Coco, too. It's just the thought of "letting go" that tears up us mothers.

Domestic Diva said...

I am so lost with out the girls when they go to school. We all got the flu and I am loving them home again. I bet he will do just fine with the goodbye!
Have a fabulous day!!!!
xxxx me

Live.Love.Eat said...

Wow, this sounds harder than my son going to kindergarten. But that's probably because he has been going to pre-school since he was a baby so he was used to the separation everyday. Now, he loves kindergarten!!!! Good luck!!!

ilovepink said...

Good Luck!!! I still miss my 3 year old everyday. I thought I wouldn't cry this year but, I did. She is handling it FINE! It is so fun to see all of their crafts and see what they have learned everyday! I bombard her with 20 questions everyday!

Life, Love And Lola said...

Awwwww! You'll do fine Mrs. Promise!


The 5 Bickies said...

Such great advice from your school and other readers. By far, I think preschool is the hardest. I am ready to send #3 to Kindergarten and I am fine with it. Sure helps when you know they are more than ready. And my daughter is more than ready! Now if only it was longer. She is out at 11:40!

Kate said...

Good luck! I think you have already received some great advice.

Re #4: The family I nannnied for in DC taped a photo of the fam/parent and child into the lunch box. It seemed to work pretty well.

Houses, Couches and Babies said...

All of the tips you mentioned were great. I would also add talking up preschool and his teacher in these days leading up to it. Using the word "get" to go to preschool instead of "have" to go to preschool. Having him meet his teacher before his first day is so helpful because he already has a "friend" or familiar face in the class. My only other advice is to try not to drag the goodbye out. He senses your emotions, so only show excited and happy...even if you have to fake it! Good luck. It will be great! You will love having special time with just you and your daughter, too!

Leslie said...

It is hard letting them go but he will love it!! Sounds like you already have some great ideas to get him ready! My oldest little boy started real kindergarten in public school a couple of weeks ago and I was freaking out! But it all worked out and he loves it. Now I can't wait for my little one to start back to preschool next week!! :) Just think of all the alone time you will have with Coco! Can I ask you a favor? Will you go to and vote on my image? I entered a photo contest and I am dying to win. Right now I am a few votes behind number one!! My image is number 6! Thanks! Let us know how he does the first day!!

Eloise said...

I'll second the recommendation for the book The Kissing Hand. We still maintain that tradition (well, Dots and I do - I can't get Hockey Boy to go along with it anymore).

I hope Landon enjoys school!

Clare said...

i definitely may need this advice. Bradley starts next week. He went last year, but has been extremely clingy this summer. he had a hard time at the open house this morning. i hope it goes well next week for me and for you:)