Parenting: Don't Ask- Just TELL! The Perils of Premissive Parenting!



Maybe I'm living in the dark ages but I can hardly take what I witness these days. Permissive parenting has taken over the universe. Kids are unruly and impolite. Where are the rules? Where is the discipline? Parents don't know how to be parents anymore. They are FRIENDS to their kids. Kiss of death!!!!

I witness kids running all over restaurants, planes, climbing all over things they have no business being on. I see kids being RUDE to their parents and other adults. I have a theory.....

One of the reasons this is happening? ASKING.


Parents all over the place are constantly asking their children everything. I mean everything. Here are a few examples:


Do you need a time out?

Do you want to get down from there?

Do you want to leave?

Do you want to eat dinner?

and my favorite:

Do you Want To Go To Bed?


We are not ASKERS over here. WE TELL. We have a Don't Ask Just Tell Policy. Works like a charm.

We TELL them when to go to bed, eat, leave, go into time out etc. These are not questions. They are statements. When kids are left with the question of do you want to go to bed? What do you think their answer will be? Of course they will want to stay up all night!

Also I see no FOLLOW THROUGH. Even parents who tell their kids to do something, let the whole thing go when the child refuses. These are the battles you have to win now or teenage years will be a hell ride.

Okay, I may have some readers who say One Fab Mom!! Lighten up! Give your kids some freedom and choice! Believe me, I do. They have fun times these kids, but discipline is a MUST. Permissive parenting has nasty affects later on. Studies have shown:

The Effects of Permissive Parenting

Children raised by permissive parents:
  • Lack self-discipline
  • Have poor social skills
  • May be self-involved and demanding
  • May feel insecure due to the lack of boundaries and guidance
Doesn't sound good does it? How do you feel? Are you a permissive parent? Drill Sargent? Something in between? Are you seeing permissive parenting all over the place like me?

3 comments:

Bama Girl in AZ said...

Amen! I am my daughter's mother - that's it! lol yes we have fun together and hang out but ALL it takes is one look from me and she knows she needs to straighten up. I think a small does of fear on her behalf is good. She needs to know I am always in charge.

KatiePerk said...

I am struggling with this too!
I don't get it. I am hoping to be a teller as my child gets older.

eas said...

I find myself giving options and choices too much. Need to work on that.