Oh no she didn't....YES I did! I left my poor children and ran off to Palm Springs with the Mr. Best thing I could have done. So glad I went. And it almost didn't happen.
I have not often left my babies. Maybe once or twice, over night. I worry about them too much and we don't have a ton of family near by. That being said I knew the Mr and I needed to have:
1) A conversation without being interrupted. 2) Some Sexy time when I am not exhausted. and 3) LAUGHS!!!
And we did. Mr and I talked during the drive up and back, at dinner at a French Bistro and all times in between. We caught up on all things business, kids, and life! As for laughs we were howling trying to imitate Kristen Wiig and Fred Armisen when they are Garth and Kat the singing team.
We literally died laughing. I mean I was crying laughing trying to do this!!! Have you seen the sketch? You can watch it here:
Twenty five years ago I was sixteen years old. That's the year Oprah came to television. Now I don't think I was an Oprah viewer from the start, but I can remember my watching after I graduated college. I was living in New York with my room mate Lisa LoCicero (of General Hospital fame). We were both studying acting, but more importantly, we were both trying to figure out who we were.
Oprah always had an interesting guest, a motivational point of view, an inspiring story to share. Through the years I have hashed out many a problem saying to a friend "that's like the Oprah show where..." or "well you know Oprah would say that...".
I have always loved Oprah. I loved it when she started the book club. I loved it when she started the Angel network. I loved it when she started having "aha" moments. I have loved every second. The thought that Oprah will not be there like she has been for me since my early twenties, kind of terrifies me a little.
I haven't watched the 3rd to last or second to last shows I have Tivo'd. I know tomorrow is her last show. What will she do on her last show? Are you going to watch? Are you in denial like me?
I was having a terrible day.....that is until theses arrived!
Since Coco and I both had a birthday, we received some goodies!!! Hair clips, flip flops, head bands, could you just die? So cute! Coco has her Mommy and Me class today and I am going to put a big ol' flower on her head for sure!!
Sometimes I am surprised to learn, that everyone is not raising their kids exactly like me. I just assume we are all doing the same stuff, in different ways. That was until I was at a birthday dinner the other night. The subject of playdates arose. I was telling everyone about Landon's playdates, when we do them, how we do them after school....when one of the mothers said: "Playdates? We never do those."
I have to admit I was pretty shocked. Then I started thinking, she works full time, and her kids play with each other (which is what she told me), and another women piped in she doesn't do them either. "Who has the time to organize and set that up!"
Playdates can be a HUGE pain sometimes, but I feel like they are really necessary. Socializing your kid, having them learn to get along with another person, is really important. Also, kids develop relationships at first through their parents. They can't arrange their own playdates at 4! They need us to give them a little social life. Landon usually has playdates 2-3 times a week with boys and girls from class. Helps also when I get to be with a Mom I like too! The times I am working, I get the nanny to do activities with them but am usually near by. They have a ball for the most part.
What do you think? Do you do playdates? Think they are important? Love them? Hate them? Don't get me started on sports (Landon's too young), but I had a parent tell me he ignored his kid's begging to be on a team and hoped she would stop asking so they didn't have to have weekends full of games!
In honor of Mother's Day I am posting something my mother wrote to me when I asked what lipstick she and my Grandmommie wore. She may kill me but too late! Read on about A History of Lipstick.
My favorite lipstick is Estee Lauder's 'Coral Melon'. You know I'm hoarding what I have left! They don't make it anymore. I've always worn navy blue mascara; now that's hard to find!
I love perfume too. Dolce & Gabana "Light Blue" eau de parfume for summer; Ralph Lauren's 'Safari' other times. Other favorites now hard to find are Krizia' & Deneuve. When I was younger(14) I wore 'Miss Dior'. I can NOT live without my 'Aloe After Sun' moisturizer by Hawaiian Tropic. It was originally called 'Forever Tan' and my mother always used it! Grandmommie (my Mother) always wore a "frosted coral" lipstick. I thought it made her skin glow, but maybe it was because she always cleaned her face every night with Pond's cold cream! She used rouge from a small tin container. I don't remember her using any foundation...You know her favorite perfume, 'Toujour Moi', but for special occasions she wore 'Shalimar' perfume. Mam'ma (your great grandmother) used makeup by Helena Rubenstein, which smelled sooooo good! She always wore a pinkish lipstick. And pink pearls (She loved pink!). Her perfume was 'Arpege' by Lanvin. Every morning she would wake up, do stretching exercises; then take a shower ending with cold water! Once I saw an ironing board in her room and I asked her what it was for. Apparently she laid it flat on the floor, then lifted one side a few inches. Then she would lay on it with her head on the lower section...(circulation & back?) I have always wondered where she got this idea from: it's kind of like our "inversion" benches (Brookstone). Recently I was looking for a night cream and came upon Estee lauder's 'Resilience Lift Extreme'.
Guess what it smells like?! Mam'ma's 'Helena Rubenstein' make up! (Cue angels singing!)
Ah, the memories!
Last summer we enrolled Landon in swim lessons with the Water Whisperer. This was not something Landon, or I was looking forward to. He was one of those kids who did not like swimming. He didn't even like getting his hair wet in the bath tub!!! He was very nervous, didn't like water in his face, and he was not happy about getting in the pool.
We showed up for lessons and the first day or two, there was a lot of tears. He was upset, he didn't want to swim. By the third day, Landon was feeling more confident. By the fifth day, he was thrilled. He was happy. He was joyful. He was swimming!
This has seriously been the highlight of my summer. To have a kid who was not happy about swimming become a person who loves the water, is worth it's weight in gold to me. The water whisperer has great instructors who are kind but firm, loving but disciplined.
By the end of our set if lessons Landon was not only jumping off the diving board in the deep end, but volunteering to go first!! AMAZING.
This year we are taking lessons again to refresh and get ready for the summer. This year Landon asked me if we could go back to the Water Whisperer! He loved his instructor!I cannot say enough about the owner Emily or her staff! We love the Water Whisperer!!
This can be a hard day for those who have lost a Mom or who are unable to get pregnant. It can be heartbreaking! After I was first married the Mr and I tried to get pregnant for a year and a half. It was a miserable time. I can remember, all dressed up in church, bawling looking at all the precious little girls dressed up. I wanted children so badly. It seemed like a cruel joke.
Thanks to in vitro (Landon) and Mojitos (Coco) I became pregnant. Really, the reason I have children at ALL is because of the prayer list at church. So many people prayed for my sweet babies to come and they did.
I just want you to know that things get better. You can be in the pit of depression, your life in the gutter and next year, the sun is shining. This is how life is. So to all the Mother's out there, chin up! Hang in there! Celebrate motherhood whether you are a Mom, want to be one, have one, or need one. We can Mother each other. Give a Mom you know a big hug today and tell her what a great job she's doing!!
I hope you have a fabulous Mother's Day weekend! Mine is a little up in the air, waiting to hear if the weather is nice enough to be at the beach! Landon just got over a bout of pneumonia and I am happy to say he is much better.
In honor of Mother's Day, treating yourself, and putting yourself on the list....a great give away!
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I am reading the most amazing book. Let me say, I am re-reading the most amazing book (because really I start books, put them down and get busy and have to RE START!) "Find Your Strongest Life" by Marcus Buckingham. One of the things he keeps asking is if women are happier then they were 20 or 30 years ago. The answer from all his studies is no!
One of the things making us unhappy? Too many choices. We wanted to have it all. The choice to work if we wanted and raise a family. The choice to not work. The choice to work part time or all the time. For some of us the economy made those choices for us, but still we feel torn. Should I work less and spend more time with the kids? Should I work more and try to get a promotion? Should I start the business I have been dreaming of? Should I quit the job I hate and see what's out there? Men make similar choices but they don't agonize over them!
"For all the dilemmas men face-and they have their share- there isn't much of a debate about whether they should work or put their family first. If they take an hour out of the day to meet their child at school, they're applauded. If they take a whole day, they're held up as exemplary models. And if they choose to stay at home, they have magazine articles written about them."
Isn't it annoying? True though. Certainly we don't want to go back to having less choices, but it's how we learn to use the choices that is the key. I'm the person who needed bestie to come with me to Bloomies the other day and find a pair of jeans. I almost had a panic attack seeing how many different kinds of jeans there were. I didn't want that many choices.
Since starting my own business I have made a lot of choices. I chose to start my business. Work more hours. Spend less time with the kids. Hire a nanny. These are choices I agonize over, even though I am still very present in my kids lives. I wonder about these choices and sometimes wake up at 4am thinking about them.
Of course my husband is sleeping soundly next to me.
I could not be happier that Osama Bin Laden was finally killed by some crafty and brave Navy Seals. This is a victory we needed. Yes, there will be other Osama's but what he did on 911 I will never forget. I am reprinting the story of my friend Pete who died on that day. NEVER FORGET.
Where were you on 9/11 nine years ago? I was on the couch watching the news when it was interrupted by the report a plane had hit the one of the twin towers. At first it seemed like an accident. There was so much confusion. Then the second plane hit. Such horrifying sights. Husband and I had been together only a few weeks when this happened and he got on a plane to attend my friends husbands funeral. He was killed that day along with the rest of his colleagues at Cantor Fitzgerald. His wife Michelle was a childhood friend. Here's her tribute to him:
"Pete had such a beautiful spirit. Pete loved life and he was filled with a never-ending enthusiasm that he extended to each and every person that he met. Anyone who met Pete-even just in passing-walked away thinking "what a great guy". He was the most genuine, generous, happy and fun loving person I have ever known and we are better people for having had him in our lives.
There was not a part of Pete's life that he did not enjoy. He loved his job at Cantor Fitzgerald and the excitement and challenges that came with it. He loved our life in Bronxville and the close friends that we have made these past five years. And to Pete's friends from Villanova were the brothers he never had.
As a husband, Pete always made me feel so special. The sparkle in his eye gave me so much happiness and we had such joy in all that we did and all that we shared. When I married Pete he made a good life great and I will miss him unspeakably every day for the rest of my life. As a Father, I can only say that his spirit goes on in Jack and Griffin. Nothing was more important to Pete than the time he spent with the boys whether it was fishing, bike riding, his recent camping overnight with Jack-or simply walking around with Griffin on his shoulders. He always looked forward to coaching little league, boy scouts, football games and being an influential part of their lives.
If we can remember all of the ways Pete touched our lives, and pass it on to his boys, then his spirit will live on in them. It is so important to me that his children know just how special he was- so please share his life with them...as I will do every day. And finally, as Pete died on my birthday I feel the need to recognize his life as my biggest gift. He is the finest person I have ever known and as short as my time was with him was, I am forever blessed for having loved him."
If your kids are dying to have a "sleep over" but are too young, try having a pretend one. Invite the friend over and leave the kids with a baby sitter while you and the parents go out for dinner. Let the kids have their sleeping bags and PJ's and go to sleep. When they wake up in the morning asking where their friend is, say they just left!